SOUL MATES
What would you do
when I’m gone --
When the body withers
And the soul departs
Taking me in its fold
To a place you've never known?
Will you think of me --
In a crowded room,
Or in the alley
That runs past my dwelling
Looking back
Just to get a glimpse of me
Even by mistake
As you did before?
Will the memories
Of happy moments linger
And make you weep?
Will you forgive
The innumerable mistakes I made,
Sometimes to hate you
And hurt you
And make you break?
I wonder.
Perhaps you’ll move along,
Find a friend,
Not to share your pain
But to shy away from it
In goblets of spirit, and sometimes
In the magic of music
To mask any trace of loss,
And look brave and sane.
Perhaps thoughts of me
Will fade away with your dreams
And in the touch of morning showers
You won’t call out my name.
No, not anymore.
But my soul will be free
To do as I please.
It’ll take the last flight
To a different plane
With the only treasure I have,
My thoughts of you
Where all hurts will ease
And all pains will freeze,
‘coz we were true soul mates
Only torn asunder.
********
Calcutta
July 12, 2014
DUSHYANT
What if one day
You forget who I am!
What if you never look my way
With love in your eyes,
And a song on your lips,
But with a crazy, blank stare?
What if the clock stops ticking
And time stands still?
Would you remember
The vows we had taken;
The promises that were made
Never to be broken?
What if the past fades away
When the dark night ends
And the present is a blur
When thoughts don’t mend?
What if you just walk out the door
And lose your way in a blind alley --
Never to return?
I shall cease to exist
'coz in your eyes live my pride,
My courage to be what I am
And it can all fade
Just in the flash of an eye.
Ridden with guilt,
I'd ask dear God
to give me another chance
To turn your face.
I'd bring back old memories
And hold them still
before your vacant eyes
To wipe out your fears.
I'd turn on the lights of joy,
I'd drive out the spells of doom
And whisper in your ears,
‘Nothing is lost, nothing's gone
You're with me and mine alone.'
**************
(Written for Alzheimer patients)
July 13,2014, Calcutta
LIFE IN LIMBO
From his place –
He saw it all.
Tethered to a wheelchair,
Tied and secure,
He felt like a balloon
Buoyant in his very own
Flights of fancy.
.
Tired of inactivity,
His mind ticked away, and
As a daily chore,
Was diligent in futile investigation
Of life around him --
Unfolding itself in many hues,
Especially in Springtime.
Inert and immobile,
He longed for infinite freedom,
To savor and touch
The sumptuous splendors
Of Nature around him;
But with heroic stoicism
He feigned inertia.
The sudden buzz of the bee
Broke his dull reverie.
Creating invisible loops in the air,
With mirthless abandon,
Turning circle after circle,
In wild exploration
It made an abrupt and hasty exit.
Departing like a conqueror--
Leaving behind nothing
But the faint echo of a din
That’s deafening….
It made him gasp.
The thirst for lost youth
Ached inside him.
Moments later,
The flicker of a pair of gauzy,
Luminous, fragile wings
With colors woven into patterns
Through which the sun
Danced into the room --
Caught his eye.
There was no hum,
No quandary,
No tearing hurry
But a playful flurry,
In the guileless pursuit of pleasure.
Frail and fickle,
Capricious and curious,
The winged creature fluttered about,
Delirious and naïve,
Delighted -- just to be alive.
But in an instant
Those shimmering wings,
So crafted with love and care,
Fell to pieces --
Fractured by some spinning,
Voracious blades above.
The magnificent creature,
So gay and blithe,
Lay quivering and shuddering,
Like a human in seizure
Till it lay motionless --
Like a useless piece of disposable adornment.
He saw hope fading away,
Joy recoiling with pain and
Life ending unfulfilled --
Perhaps all in vain!
In a life that is ravenous --
Sparing none but the industrious,
Nobody weeps for the slothful,
The ineffectual angels
That leave behind
Not their footprints
but just their souls.
With his heart's rapid beat
His eyes grew misty.
He inhaled the fragrant air --
And destiny shelved to a life in limbo.
Even though in Springtime.
****************
DDR,
CALCUTTA, MARCH 11, 2014
CAUGHT IN A WEB
The church clock chimes ten.
It’s a reminder of the undaunted
Passage of time and
Life caught in a web.
I hurry and scribble
A few words, lest I forget,
On the blank pages of my mind.
Of things that I cared for,
Of people I had failed.
Should I tear up the letters
Outliving their purpose,
Or save them to smell
In bitter moments of despair?
Should I wait for the morning to break,
or pray to the Rain Gods
To hold the showers in check,
So I could run across the street
To get a rose for my beloved,
Languishing in a surgical bed?
But, shush, how can I?
He's not mine,
No, not anymore.
Should I stay in
And plug in
for a fresh brew of coffee?
Or pass it, so I won’t wake
In the middle of the night
Fearing God’s rage for my sins
And lack of mercy?
But there’s no time to dither,
No time to falter;
In a moment darkness could fall --
And swallow up the morsels of joy
That still linger with hope
In the beat of my heart.
There’s no time
To dress the wounds,
to wonder and weigh,
No time to blame and curse,
But do what you may.
The moment is now --
And I must run.
I should open the door
And step out in the rain
To love and forgive,
Before it’s too late
and I go insane.
************
Written on July 13, 2014, Calcutta,
FLOWERS IN THE DUST
The girl stood still for a moment.
The street lights flickered in her eyes
Quivering in shame.
She felt the rain
Slide down her fragile frame
In rivulets —
Washing away the sins
Of a soulless moron.
She moves just a little
Like a shadow --
Muffling her fears
And strangling her dreams,
Resigned to calamitous interludes
With life like this
on thorny paths--
Hovering between disgrace
and delusions.
But there’ll be no candles
Burning for her on street corners,
No slogans for her rights,
No justice or hope, for sure,
To retrieve her maligned honor.
A child born out of lust
Can only languish in the dust,
And sink into the shrouds of oblivion
As she is no one but just
A nameless, faceless pavement dweller.
Calcutta, 16, 10,2014
HOW DEEP IS DEEP
How deep is Sorrow
When prayers remain unheard,
Life is lost in a flash,
Moments are gone
Never to return
And we carry the burden
Of guilt and grief
For eons -- on and on?
How deep is Sin?
What color is it?
Gray or black, or
A bit of both?
We may never know.
It just sucks us
Into an ocean of oblivion
Where we surrender our souls
Never to look back.
How deep is the pit that we dig?
The abysmal depth
Where we are thrown
To weep and beg
In fear for mercy?
A pit so deep --
Where Truth slinks away
Love withers,
And the soul decomposes
Preying on its own flesh.
Yet we know no better
And march along the path,
As if blindfolded,
That leads us to the
Unfamiliar, unforgiving
Bottomless pit.
(In appreciation of the Law of Karma)
Calcutta, July 14, 2014
THE PARTING GIFT